Flip the Switch.

  My call is on the way and me actually leaving is getting closer and closer. And to be totally honest I bounce around from pure excitement, to cool and confident, and to totally terrified. Every so often I will think that maybe this isn't the right thing, that I shouldn't leave after all. I love my family I love the life I have now do I really want to leave it for 18 months? Things aren't going to be the same when I get back. I won't be the same, my brothers won't be the same. What am I doing? I'm going to miss so much of my brothers lives and just miss my family. Who knows how many of my friends will get married and have kids. Who am I going to live with when I come home? These questions and many others are constantly racing through the back of my mind...
    Even though these thoughts and worries are very real and I think that leaving will always be scary there are things that comfort me. I remember when I graduated from high school and left to go to college I though my life was over. I was leaving everyone I knew and moving two and half hours away from my family. What was I supposed to do without everyone and everything I knew? Once I let go of these fears and let myself move on I had a great time. College was great and I adjusted to this new way of life. 
   I remember the first time I came home from school. I thought it was going to be so weird. Everyone's life at home had kept going while I was at school they didn't just sit around and wait for me to come back. But these fears were all for nothing. My family was waiting for me with open arms. It wasn't weird. Sure I had missed out on things, but after a couple of hours of catching up it was like I never left. Things with friends were of course a little different. My relationships with some faded and with others grew stronger. Those who were going to be in my life forever were there and things worked with them as well. Things with both family and friends wasn't the same as before I went to school, but it wasn't a bad different. No matter how long I had been away they still loved me and I could always come home and pick up where we left off. 
  It's like flipping a switch. There is the side that is the way things are at college and then there is a side that is the way things are at home. I'm still the same person with a few minor changes, but where ever I go all I have to do is flip the switch and it is like nothings changed. I still remember the things from where ever I was last and don't erase my past, but I can always flip that switch and adjust to the life I'm currently living in. All I need to do with the mission is add another switch. I know that I will adjust to the life of a missionary and that when I come home I can flip that switch and be home as well. I know that not only can I flip the switch, but I will enjoy my time in the mission field as well. I also know that when we put the Savior and His work first the rest of our life will work out. Everything will be fine and He will take care of us. He will be with not only me, but my family as well. This work isn't about me and yet He will still watch over me. Missions are a great thing and I'm so excited for mine. It is normal to have doubts we just need to remember that His spirit will be there to guide us and that it will all work out in the end. I'm leaving my family for 18 months so that others can be with their family for eternity. And I mean that and I testify that it is true.