I've Got Hurt Feelings

  I almost turned the water off when I realized that the drip is turning into more of a drizzle and I'm pretty sure it will stop on its own soon. This next little thought droplet is very...feely....now I understand why missionaries are supposed to go to bed at ten thirty. (feelings come out at night) Fun Fact: I can sit up in this bunk bed and my head doesn't hit the ceiling....short people problems. Wow. Easily distracted. To the point!!
  This world is sad. It makes me sad. I don't even feel that often and it makes me sad. You see something will happen in my life and I will think I am so lucky there is someone out there who has it so much worse than me. Then I start to think about what those things are that are worse then my problems. And I realize that so many of those problems are horrible and no one should have to deal with them!!!!!! 
   I will start to think about people all over the world starving, shivering, dying all alone, or even scenes like Les Mis where the rebels are fighting and die proud for something they believe in, things like that kill me inside. I love people and it hurts me to know that others suffer and that others are the cause of the suffering. I think what hurts most is knowing that in most cases there isn't anything I can really do to help. I don't think I would be very successful if I went to random countries that were oppressed and tried to start a rebellion to free them. Even if I sung the Can You Hear the People Sing song, as inspiring as it is. (in 9th grade my teacher thought I was going to save Africa...how would I do that...) 
  I also think about how sad I am when I see someone I care about make a wrong choice. That really gets me too. I know that they know better and I love them. Because I love them I want them to live in such a way that they can return to live with our Heavenly Father and be with me for eternity...sometimes it doesn't seem like that will happen.
   Usually after thinking all these thoughts it leads to this...if I feel like this how must our Savior feel?! He loved us so much that He gave His life! It must be SO hard for Him! Especially because as much as He must want to He can't interfere. It's our lives and He gave us agency. It is up to us what's going to happen. It must be so sad to watch your children suffer. It is probably so hard watching those suffer that refuse Him or don't know that He is there. He loves us and of course He wants to help! It is our duty to spread that gospel so that the world can be happier!! Our job to be worthy to be a tool in his hands to spread the joy that this gospel brings. It is also our responsibility to live in such a way that He doesn't have to be sad about us. If we live righteously and in a way that He would want us to that is one less tear that He has to cry. We want Him to be happy and we can work to make that happen.