Sometimes my job is a little rough. Don't get me wrong I enjoy it. Like today, today was a great day at work. I think part of the reason it is so hard (like yesterday) is because I really care about those kids. It is a tad bit frustrating when you work so hard to help them and get them to be better and they don't understand. You just see so much potential in them and wish they could see it for themselves. These feelings created at work sometimes lead to worse feelings. Let's just say occasionally (it's only happened once) I have a work induced psychotic break down. Yesterday was one of those days.
Work will just get me in this state of emotional upheaval and exhaustion. Which unfortunately leaves me vulnerable to all kinds of things that normally wouldn't matter, but instead push me over the edge. Yesterday there was a certain topic or idea that was especially getting to me. I had this feeling that caring about people sucks.
I care about people. I will go out of my way to make everyone happy. Do whatever I can to make people feel included. Nothing hurts me more or makes me more upset than when someone feels left out or doesn't like me. Silly I know. People liking me really shouldn't matter. But it kills me all the same. I couldn't get over it yesterday. Or how you can give so much of yourself to someone to try and help them, but they can't ever seem to do anything for you when you need it. I was quite upset to be honest. (No I didn't cry) But I was just tired and angry. When I remembered the wise words of a friend...pray.
So pray I did. And the Spirit told me to read my scriptures. I was a little doubtful at first. I didn't think I was in the best mood to read the scriptures, but gotta listen to those promptings. So read I did. I didn't find anything in the scriptures to help with my situation, but I was in a better state of mind and was open to the Spirit. I then felt prompted to read this magnificent book "Why I'm a Mormon." While reading I found a thought that really helped me.
In the story I had turned to the main character was feeling sorry for himself and felt prompted to read D&C 122:8. While reading that verse this phrase struck him, "The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?"
I decided to apply this phrase to my situation. Think about this. The Savior has suffered everything, has felt every sadness. The pain He went through is unimaginable. Do I really have anything to complain about? Even more than that think of all He has done for us. I may do a lot for people, but the Savior gave the ultimate gift...His life. He literally gave all that He had for us. So that one day we can live with him again. Think about how many people reject that gift on a daily basis. People who know better. I really don't have any room to complain. If the Savior can literally give His all, then I can give what little I have to give without complaint. The Savior doesn't ever get mad at our lack of appreciation and take it all away. Instead He loves us anyway. He may temporarily move on and help another, but He never forgets us. I can follow His example and do the same. I can be grateful for His sacrifice and everyday try and show how thankful I am by reaching out to others.
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